


Lie with me

by AlexxaSick



Series: hundreds of reasons [1]
Category: Arashi (Band), Johnny's Entertainment, Jpop
Genre: Angst, Heavy Angst, Infidelity, M/M, POV First Person, so much fucking angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-04-07
Updated: 2012-04-07
Packaged: 2017-11-28 08:08:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/672158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlexxaSick/pseuds/AlexxaSick
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I just woke up late at night and started writing xD this I want to dedicate to sharksoul24 because I owe her Junba since for ever xDDD</p>
    </blockquote>





	Lie with me

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sharksoul](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=sharksoul).



> I just woke up late at night and started writing xD this I want to dedicate to sharksoul24 because I owe her Junba since for ever xDDD

To say I don’t love you would be I lie.

I lie anyway.

I tell you it’s only sex and your eyes lose that sparkle I adore with all my heart. Your mouth tells me to “fucking take your pants off already.” Or it won’t even be that.

I lie and tell you it doesn’t mean a thing once and again, every time we are like this. And as always I tell you I won’t hurt you. Seeing my fingers get lost inside you I know I lied yet again, that I already damaged you beyond repair, I know it, but I can’t stop myself. Not from lying, or from being with you.

Our eyes meet as you arch your back to push against my fingers. Yours are shiny with tears, not sad tears, though. I am certain of it when you lick your dry lips and moan once more. I know you, how perfectly flawed you are, how to make you lose control or how you don’t have much control anyway, how to make you mine.

_Mine._

It sounds so cute, so sweet.

As if.

I dream I own you lying alone in my bed, I dream I have you when I tell you to turn around and to spread your ass cheeks for me. I like to watch you as you get desperate and start finger yourself as I put on a condom.

“ _So impatient._ ” I tell you slapping your hands away.

You chuckle and ask me to _stop teasing already_. You are hot beyond belief as I dig my dick inside you. I do it slowly. Not because I don’t want to hurt you but because I know I hurt you more if I take my time, that it makes you more desperate and I know you well enough to know you’ll start to wonder if I really want this, if I really need this.

And I do. I do it as much as my fingers carve the skin on your hips when I hold you still. I lean over your body and bite your shoulder, the one with the birthmark. I bite you to bruise you, to let **him** know you were here. I have the need to let him know that just because he won’t touch you, you remain untouched.

I start to move inside you looking at the bruise I just made. I discover another reason to hurt you as your hips start to move against me. I want you to sport a badge. A sign of how much I’m hurting you every time, something others can see. You set the rhythm with which you want to be fucked and I comply.

You’re so wonderfully tight and I happily would spend the rest of my life doing this, lost in you. Every waking moment tasting your sweat, brushing my fingers through your hair, sucking your lips, your tongue, your life out of you.

You take care of your own orgasm and I start to abandon myself in your ass squeezing me tighter.

“Move Jun.” you say after we stay joined for a while. I don’t want to, I know you will only go back... I cannot bring myself to even think about it.

I get a few moments more, you allow me to. Then I gather the will to move, I flop on my back next to you. I kiss you then. No rush, no desperation. I just want to pour each and all of my feelings into you, and you let me, you drink everything I give to you. Even the bites that must hurt, you take them.

It scares the shit outta me how much of a sadist you make me. I pull away and let you get a shower, get dressed… I let you slip away because I cannot begin to sort what I feel when you’re around and we’re not fucking.

Your phone rings, and you sigh before answering, “Sho-chan?” you say with that voice, the one that Becky had called your variety-show-voice, the one you don’t know how to turn off. I know better, Sho must know too. Both of us have learned not to ask.

You shoot me a pitiful smile as you wave me goodbye and go out the hotel’s door.


End file.
